Life: Facial Graffiti

All the kids are making their eyebrows bolder now. (I want to blame the fabulous eyebrows on Korean drama actors, because those are some very attractive brows, but I doubt it is all their fault.) The women at work have them drawn in geometrically idealized eyebrow shapes with strong verticals and sharp edges, which they create with multiple tools, attention, and skill each morning.

My eyebrows, on the other hand, which have never matched my natural haircolor at any point, are fading from a neutral brown to white. They are mostly curves and awkward (startled or skeptical) angles. I’m not good at ‘multiple tools’ and ‘skill’ in the mornings. So, when I was getting my brows threaded into tidiness, I signed up to have them tinted. Tinting faded brows is the lazy way to roll out of bed and rush off to work without having a graphically important pair of features missing.

Tinting is a delicate professional thing: every box of hair dye you’ve ever seen tells you not to try it with hair products, because they will maim you. Sure enough, the eyebrow places use henna, which stains hair effectively with non-blinding, largely plant-based ingredients. My handler chose light brown, and got to work.

As she was finishing up and fresh, faintly-lemony scents evaporated from my forehead, she told me that the first day of henna is not the way it will really look: it just needs some time to finish setting. I have used henna for hair in the past, and know what she meant. So I wasn’t entirely surprised by the results.

But I was a little surprised.

Surprised in a way that could be seen from a distance.

It looks like my eyebrows have been drawn in with a Sharpie (TM).

I had other plans after my brow appointment, but cancelled them once I realized how bold my brows now (temporarily) are. My mother called, and I described this to my mother in my typical way. She couldn’t. stop. laughing.

Having delighted my mother means that I’ve achieved something worthwhile today.

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